I am not one to care about what others think of me, and it helps when you are actually shameless and give zero fùcks. A few years ago, when I used to work actively in the media industry, I took a photo of myself I thought was pretty dope (as at then) and uploaded it with what I thought was a funny caption. You know, all positive vibes.
Only for me to log in few hours later to see this nasty comment from this girl that attended the same University as me. It was a comment that haunted me for years such that I can still remember the exact words:
“See as you be. Poverty wan finish you.”
It devastated me especially since it was on a public forum. I felt ashamed and embarrassed. “How do I get back at her?” I thought to myself. I can be pretty savage with my words as well but it made no sense for me and her to be dragging ourselves on my comment section. That would have even been more degrading. I decided to quickly delete her comment instead before anyone else saw it. But her words haunted me.
“Do I really look so poor?”
“Am I a loser?”
“Is this how people, in general, see me?”
“Will I even ever amount to anything?”
Well, fast forward to today and things are looking up for me. I am on an upward trajectory. I was also on an upward trajectory back then, and seeing as I’m not yet where I want to be, the journey continues. It’s weird, but this year, my pictures on Facebook garner a surprisingly high number of likes and comments. I get friend requests and inbox messages from so many ladies. It is shocking, and I have no interest in engaging in pointless conversations or chatting them up. I guess like ants to sugar, girls are drawn to anything that bears a semblance of success, even though the content within may be a far cry from what is being advertised on the cover (packaging).
Well this same girl has been liking and occasionally comments on my photos over the past year, and I like hers too and reply her comments. She sometimes says things like “Enjoyment” or “You’re just enjoying your money alone” and I just lol or say something noncommittal.
The last picture I uploaded is still gathering a lot of likes and comments. It’s really flattering and I took the time to reply everyone. Then she sent me a message on Facebook messenger saying “Hi”. I didn’t see it until the next day and I replied “Hello”. She read it but didn’t reply. Wetin consign me?
Only for me to find out that she has now unfriended me. Hahahahaha… what did I do? I guess some people just can’t stomach that sinking feeling they get when they see others doing good, especially when they had, for whatever reason, written them off. Especially when it’s someone who, for whatever reason, they had decided they were better than. It’s worse when they themselves haven’t achieved much over the years, and it begins to feel like everyone else are doing big things and making boss moves.
I say good riddance to bad rubbish, and more importantly, I thank God for His Grace over my life. In many ways, I am very lucky. A natural born, lazy hustler but still, I’ve been fortunate. We can only hope that things get better.
We should always endeavour to spread positivity wherever we go. Crack a dry joke to make someone smile, flatter, praise, exaggerate, charm your way through. Lie if you have to. You don’t need to tear others down to make yourself feel better. Do whatever you can to make others happier than they were when you met them, because what goes around comes around. That is how people get attracted and become drawn to you, because you are just a walking ray of sunshine. When I tell people I’m an introvert they hardly believe me because they just can’t see it. But I know who I am, that deeply introspective dude that feels everything deeply and prefers to be by himself. Words are immensely powerful!
Till next time,
Has someone ever tried to put you in a box before? Share your experience!